An angry relative is shouting at you about their family member's care. What is the best first response?

Raise your voice to match theirs

Tell them they are overreacting

A patient makes a complaint about their care. How should the nurse respond?

Listen, take it seriously, apologise if appropriate, and follow the complaints process

Ignore it, as complaints are inevitable

Tell the patient they are wrong

You have a genuine concern about a colleague's practice but feel it will be awkward to raise. What should you do?

Raise it respectfully and appropriately, as avoiding it risks patient safety

Gossip about it with other colleagues

Wait until something goes seriously wrong

During a disagreement with a colleague, what keeps it professional?

Focusing on the issue and the patient, calmly and respectfully

Winning the argument at all costs

Involving the patient in the dispute

An interaction with a patient is becoming heated. What body language helps de-escalate?

Calm, open and non-threatening posture and tone

Crossed arms and a raised voice

Part B5 of 8 Leading and Managing Care, Working in Teams Chapter 59 of 75

Conflict and Difficult Conversations Questions

NMC CBT practice on conflict: de-escalation, professional calm, difficult conversations, complaints, and worked scenario answers.

Start reading ← Back to all parts ~5 min read

By JobLabs Editorial · UK healthcare reference editorial team

· July 16, 2026 · Updated Jul 17, 2026 · 2 min read

Conflict is part of any workplace, and healthcare adds fear, grief and pressure to the mix. The CBT tests whether you can handle difficult situations professionally, keeping people safe and preserving relationships.

De-escalation

The core skill with an angry patient or relative is de-escalation. You stay calm, listen without interrupting, and acknowledge their feelings, which lowers the temperature and helps you find the concern underneath the anger. Your tone and body language matter as much as your words: calm, open and non-threatening posture helps, while a raised voice, crossed arms, standing over someone or turning away all read as confrontational. Meeting anger with anger, or with dismissal, almost always makes it worse. These questions reward the composed, listening response every time.

Complaints

A complaint is handled by listening, taking it seriously, apologising where appropriate, and following the local complaints process, not by becoming defensive or arguing. A complaint is an opportunity to put something right and to learn, and handling it openly often resolves it before it grows. Telling a patient they are wrong, or ignoring the complaint, damages trust and usually escalates things.

Do not avoid the difficult thing

A recurring theme is that avoidance is not a strategy. Sidestepping a genuine problem, whether a patient safety concern or an awkward conversation, tends to let it grow. Issues are addressed calmly, honestly and respectfully. A nurse with a real concern about a colleague’s practice raises it appropriately, because staying silent to keep the peace, or waiting for something to go seriously wrong, puts patients at risk. Gossiping about it instead of raising it properly is no better.

Disagreement, kept professional

Disagreements with colleagues happen, and handled well they are healthy. What keeps them professional is staying focused on the issue and the patient, calmly and respectfully, rather than making it personal or trying to win at all costs. And the patient is never drawn into staff conflict. The through-line of this chapter is simple: stay calm, listen, address the real issue, and keep the patient’s interests at the centre. Next: supervision, mentoring and student support. Five conflict scenarios first.

Sources & further reading

Key takeaway from Conflict and Difficult Conversations Questions

Frequently asked questions

How do you de-escalate an angry patient or relative?

Stay calm, listen without interrupting, acknowledge their feelings, keep your tone and body language non-threatening, and try to understand and address the underlying concern. Meeting anger with defensiveness or dismissal usually makes it worse.

How should a nurse respond to a complaint?

Listen, take it seriously, apologise where appropriate, and follow the local complaints process rather than becoming defensive. A complaint is a chance to put something right and to learn, and handling it openly often resolves it before it escalates.

Should difficult issues be avoided to keep the peace?

No. Avoiding a genuine problem, whether a patient safety concern or a difficult conversation, usually lets it grow. Issues are addressed calmly, honestly and respectfully. Professionalism means dealing with the difficult thing, not sidestepping it.

Check your understanding

Quick quiz: Conflict and Difficult Conversations Questions

5questions. Click an answer to see the explanation. Your score is saved on this device only.

1
An angry relative is shouting at you about their family member's care. What is the best first response?
De-escalation starts with staying calm, listening, and acknowledging the person's feelings, which helps reduce the anger and uncover the underlying concern. Matching their volume, walking off, or dismissing them tends to inflame the situation.
2
A patient makes a complaint about their care. How should the nurse respond?
A complaint is handled by listening, taking it seriously, apologising where appropriate, and following the proper process. Defensiveness, dismissal, or arguing damage trust and often escalate the complaint. Openness frequently resolves it and offers a chance to improve.
3
You have a genuine concern about a colleague's practice but feel it will be awkward to raise. What should you do?
A genuine concern is raised respectfully through the right channel, because avoiding it can let a risk to patients grow. Staying silent, gossiping, or waiting for harm to occur are all failures of both professionalism and the duty to raise concerns.
4
During a disagreement with a colleague, what keeps it professional?
Professional disagreement stays focused on the issue and the patient's interests, handled calmly and respectfully. Making it personal, trying to win regardless, or drawing the patient into staff conflict all undermine care and working relationships.
5
An interaction with a patient is becoming heated. What body language helps de-escalate?
Calm, open, non-threatening body language and tone help settle a tense situation. Closed or dominant posture, a raised voice, standing over someone, or turning away all read as confrontational or dismissive and tend to escalate things.